Hi everyone! Today I got the full Peru construction mentality. Where as I like precision and organization when completing a project they like to “Guess”. While building the new Chapel, Ruben and I were talking about where to place the support posts. I measured the areas with a string. We do not have a tape measure. Once, I was able to make out meters from the distances I divided it by the number if pillars to make. Then Ruben didn’t like the idea as he thought we should just placed them around a certain area to each other. Now once we got to this point in the day. We had already had different ideas about how to build the doorway in which we finished at this point. I was tired, exhausted, hurting and I told him that I needed to stop and pray for a bit as I was not finding strength to be patient and a good worker anymore. So I went into prayer on the ground for thirty minutes. I asked God to help me persuade him to go with my idea. Yet as soon as I called to God about it he placed a thought in my head saying, “why is your way better than his”. So I thought about all the ways my way is better and why it makes more logical sense. So then I felt confident and said God this is why it works and his way doesn’t. Then I felt a calmness come over me. I realized it wasn’t about getting the task done the way that I wanted it was about how my body language and demeanor was “telling Ruben what to do”. Am I now acting like a brother to Ruben? Am I being loving or making Ruben a slave? I felt the regret and shame at that exact moment. Realizing that I placed myself above him. I then spent the rest of the time praying how I should approach and what we be a joint agreement. At the end of the prayer, I apologized to Ruben in which, he didn’t understand why I apologized to him. Then decided to ask him what his idea was for the chapel. There are no plans its only Ruben, Marco, and I building this Chapel. He gave me his grand envision and dream and I then marked off places that it could potentially be. At the end of it the organization just came together it didn’t need to be forced or dictated to. Too many times I realize that I am brut forcing something, as I know it’s the right intention. Yet its those intentions and can allow the devil to play against us!
Today we were able to complete a doorway and outlining pillars. We mixed concrete on the ground with shovels for hours. We drilled into the foundation with chisels. We used a weight to use as a level on a pulley system. We were able to accomplish so much in so little time without the proper tools. God’s Idea of Time is non-existent he stretches and slows down time and increases productivity in our lives so much and yet we are always saying, “ I just don’t have enough time”. Why is it that we continually fall into this mindset! After I finished the work for the day my back hurt so bad that I was unable to sit and stand in a moments notice. I just felt pain. Yet as I was hurting my mind was disconnected to my body. I was happy, felt accomplished, and was excited about the next day at the Chapel on Monday. When God gives you strength I always think of this as Spiritually but does he not also help us physically when it goes numb or our minds are able to magically forget? Listen, I know this sounds like something from Harry Potter and made of fairytales but haven’t you been at that point of having nothing else except God and it all works out! Its because he is still our father, Loving and nurturing to us. He never gives us to much to handle if we seek him.
Later I meet a girl from New Zealand who is flying out on Saturday evening. She was in Peru for 6 months doing mission work and its her first mission! It was remarkable to see that she was so excited as to the idea of a mission trip that she planned it for 6 months. She is only 18 years old and has such ambition to be like God! It was a miracle to me as I feel like I was excited about a month to be able to help these people and thought that I was sacrificing and in turn God showed me that there is more that I can give and do to help. The capacity of each of us is only known by us and we must seek God in ways in which we can proclaim his Name.
I know that I am so scatterbrained and all over the place but this is what I was able to promise you. My thoughts and feelings unfiltered and hope that you can gain from it and be apart of this mission at home. My feeling to be determined by a scale of happy, sad, hurt, excitement, failure, anger, and exhaustion doesn’t exist as I am transformed is the best I can attest to. I am at peace and happy! I am in pain and fulfilled. I Know That I am acting in God’s Will!
Continue sending prayers. Continue changing peoples lives where you are. Continue becoming closer to Our Father!